Monday, April 23, 2012

I was King Arthur - today I am just me.

32 years seems like a long time.  That's because... it is!!  It was that long ago that Cathleen (my wife of 25 years) and I graduated from high school.  Quite a history she and I have together.  It was our senior year that she and I were cast opposite each other (again), this time in the musical "Camelot".  She as Guinevere and me as King Arthur.   By this point in our relationship we barely spoke off stage after rehearsals.  My fault, not hers.  Last night we went back to our high school to see "Camelot" being performed 32 years later.
 Cathleen had  been an acquaintance and a friend since elementary school.  In our sophomore year we were cast opposite each other in "Guys and Dolls".  She as Sarah Brown and me as Sky Masterson (Marlon Brando in the movie).  We enjoyed hanging out and rehearsing, yet as high school moved on I realized how open I was with Cathleen, and when you are an insecure high-schooler, that is not a good thing.  So, as the months moved on I distanced myself.  It was all for the best.  Had we stayed close the consequences could have been devastating.  You see, I was not a nice person.  The consequences suffered were endured by other young ladies.  I was pathetic, lost, and self-centered.
As we sat in the John Jay High School auditorium last night watching the drama club perform 
"Camelot" after 32 years, I was wondering how I would feel.  When the orchestra struck the first notes of the overture there was a rush of emotion from the memory.  Yet, I will tell you there is no desire to go back.  32 years later I am not the same man I was before.  Ask my wife.  She knows.  She knew me then and she knows me now.  Am I the highest example of perfection and physical prowess, like Lancelot?  Hardly.  Though... she may say so.  You see she is smitten with me and I with her!  Our life together has been progressive growth together centered on the God who created us for each other.  Jesus Christ makes good marriages that last.  Hard work, forgiveness, and trust in God.  That is all I can say about how our marriage has lasted and grown.
I think King Arthur got distracted, which is why he failed as a husband.  His dreams and Round Table became more important than the one person whom he shared those dreams with.  Camelot was his dream and it didn't last.  Neither did his marriage.  Mine?  Some bumps and hard times, but still growing strong.  Why?  I've learned to balance both dreaming AND living.  
Today I am not King Arthur.  I am just me and that is just fine! 
How about you?  Trying to be someone else or living in a dream?  Cross Your Rubicon and become who you were born to be!  


  1. Thank you Mr. Z! So happy you and Mrs. Z are married and loving each other!

  2. Celebrating our marriage, investing in our marriage, enjoying each other in our marriage...these are the keys to a healthy marriage. So I tip my glass to you both!


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